What Do You Do When You Are Angry

Why i choose this topic? yes, you're right.. I wanna "explode" my anger, but i can't.. it seems that the fire is in my head.. Yes, I’m so mad! my blood is boiling!God, i must be patient. Ok, take a deep breath!! and please be calm, Ucha!!
Must we have a stress management course to control ourselves? oh, i think it's not needed..!! just be calm, please.. and be positive thinking..

but,, what do you do if someone blames you..?? what do you do if someone accuses you whereas you don't have a fault.. God! again, we have to be patient..

Let's build anger management:
1. Please take a long deep breath,, maybe until 10 times if necessary..
2. Wipe your face with fresh water,, for muslim, "wudlu"
3. Be positive thinking. why i tell it many times..?? yes,, because i think it's very very important!! eventhough someone makes you sad, makes your feeling blue... - oh, is there a relationship??-
i think my writing is mess.. but ok,, let's continue..
4. I would try not to let the stress build up as that can cause all sorts of health problems. Hey, you know, when we get angry our adrenaline flows, our heart rate increases, and our blood pressure escalates.

5. Give ourself a break. It’s easier to think when we’re calm than when we’re agitated. Leave the room, take a walk, ‘whistle a happy tune’. Then come back to the problem, examine it, and solve it.

6. Look for the sweet spot. Learn to act and not react. Although every cloud doesn’t have a silver lining, when life hands us a lemon, we can make lemonade and when we get angry, we can find a positive way to express it!

Yes, we have to convince ourselves that we can solve the problem!

Aristotle said,

“Anybody can become angry - that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the right purpose, and in the right way - that is not within everybody's power and is not easy.”

what's my name's hidden meaning?

ok.. let's see it's true or not..
just type: Yusra Pintaningrum

You Are Wild and Outrageous

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality.You are influential and persuasive. You tend to have a lot of power over people.Generally, you use your powers for good. You excel at solving other people's problems.Occasionally, you do get a little selfish and persuade people to do things that are only in your interest.You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life.You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home.You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble.You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life.You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone.Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs.You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!

anyway.. what do you think about me? all of those true?

The Gift which Allah gave to me!

BARA! His surname is Muhammad Azalini Bara Iftikhar, so long, isn’t? But It’s meanful. He is my youngest son, so cute.. his eyes and curved upward eyelashes make anyone amazed.. and he’s got bright skin and chubby which makes anyone pinches him. When i looked at him, i couldn’t imagine his face when he was born..almost two years ago... if you read my article about “why I hate about ciprofloxacin” there’s a closed relationship.

When i gave a birth, it was smooth. My husband whispered me, “your boy is so cute, but there’s sumthing happen in his lips.” I couldn’t say anything.. speechless.. I might be shock.. or languid.. dunno.. I was still lying on operated table.. I didn’t feel pain.. just thinking.. what can I do? Then my husband whispered me again, “it’s ok, he can undergo cheiloraphy..” I knew that a cleft lip could be successfully treated with surgery soon after birth.Ok, I believed in you, hunee..

Yup, my son got “only” Cleft lip (cheiloschisis), not cleft palate (palatoschisis), It was a type of clefting congenital deformity caused by abnormal facial development during gestation. Cleft lips or palates occured in somewhere between one in 600-800 births. Cleft lip which happened to my son, formed in the top of the lip, a small gap or an indentation in the lip (partial or incomplete cleft).

According to Wikipedia, during the first six to eight weeks of pregnancy, the shape of the embryo's head is formed. If the tissues fail to meet, a gap appears where the tissues should have joined (fused). The upper lip is formed earlier than the palate. This process is very vulnerable to multiple toxic substances, environmental pollutants, and nutritional imbalance. The cause of cleft lip and cleft palate formation can be genetic in nature. Some environmental factors that have been studied include: seasonal causes (such as pesticide exposure); maternal diet and vitamin intake; retinoids- which are members of the vitamin A family; anticonvulsant drugs; alcohol; cigarette use; nitrate compounds; organic solvents; parental exposure to lead; and illegal drugs (cocaine, crack cocaine, heroin, etc). Research continues to investigate the extent to which folic acid can reduce the incidence of clefting. When my pregnancy was 4 weeks, I got mumps, and I took many drugs. Mumps (viral) might cause cleft lip to my son. OK, it was from medical side.. or it happened to me because I didn’t close to God? It could be..:(

Then, I was back to my room, in Darmo Hospital.. a nurse took my boy, I carried him, stared at him, and suddenly my tear dropped.. confused.. my husband said, “It usually happens, take it easy.. he can undergo cheiloraphy”.. ok, I knew you’ve just made me comfort.. but I believed in you, again.. and again.. and it’s a must..

One difficulty, i couldn’t nurse him because of his harelip:( but I must try! If we had a will, we could do it! And thanx god, I did.

Days by days.. the next 3 months.. Bara had undergone surgery by Prof.Djohansyah and circumcision all at once.. alhamdulillah it worked.. first, i couldn’t stand on his crying.. but i had to be a tough woman! Life must go on! Alhamdulillah, his wound healing was good.. thanx for Allah, thanx for my husband and my family who support me, and of course prof Djohansyah..

FROM ONE DISASTER TO ANOTHER

I’ve not forgotten about a tsunami disaster in Aceh 2.5 years ago. Now, a disaster has struck again in Indonesia. Oh my God, what kind of disaster that you send to us? What’s wrong with us? Did we commit a lot of sins so you send us the disaster again?

I was surprised when an earthquake happened in Jogja, the center of Java Island, on the 27th of May. I thought it was not a devastating quake. According to USA Today, more than 5000 people have been killed. It destroyed more than 105,000 homes. About 80% of Bantul was flattened by the quake. And more than 200,000 Indonesians left homeless. It was a 6.3 - magnitude earthquake. The epicentrum was in the Indian Ocean, about 5 kilometers from Bantul and about 20 kilometers from Jogja.

A disaster can’t be predicted. While people were concentrating on Mount Merapi, a devastating earthquake happened in Jogja. There was no a relationship between the activity of Mount Merapi and the earthquake. It was a tectonic earthquake, and not a volcanic earthquake. God decided He wouldn’t erupt mount Merapi but He made the earthquake. People are only planners, but God is the decision maker.

God might be warning us that we must remember Him. To avoid an eruption, people in mount merapi did a ritual offering. In Islam religion, it was syirk ( not believing in one God). Most people in Java are superstitious. God might be angry then He made the earthquake. Besides, an earthquake happened because of a movement between Eurasian and Indo-Australia lithospheres.

Most survivors were still living in group shelters. They should be given religious guidance to avoid trauma. They must be patient and accept what happened to them. According to Qur’an at http://www.al-islam.com/, An Nahl (16), verse 96 : “ What is with you must vanish. What is with Allah will endure. And We will certainly bestow, on those who patiently persevere, their reward according to the best of their actions”.

We must help our brothers and sisters in tragedy with all our efforts. A disaster can happen everywhere. We must not be complacent and we must not feel that a disaster wouldn’t happen in Surabaya. Once again, we must always remember God and we must be in straight.

PRESCHOOL FOR BABIES

Nowadays, preschools are springing up everywhere as mothers want to enroll their babies in school earlier. These preschools have many curriculum, such as developmental tasks, observation and assessment, child development, interactive experience, teaching, parent participation and involvement, environment, and activities and experiences. Even though mothers have to spend a lot of money to enroll their babies, they don’t mind. What’s more, these preschools have many facilities, such as audio visual, computers, library, field trip, student worksheets, home reading, mandarin language, native speakers, holiday programs, art and craft materials, and playing area. Children used to enter to school when they are 4 years old, but now, mothers can admit their babies to school even they are still 6 months.

There are many reasons why the mothers enroll their babies in school. First of all, most mothers are workers. They work from 6 am to 5 pm. So they leave their babies with a baby sitter or a servant. The mothers enroll their babies in school rather than leave them at home with their baby sitter or servant. Because sometimes the baby sitter or servant takes care of them while they watch television. The mothers don’t know what programs that they watch. If the programs are good for children, it doesn’t matter. But if the programs are not suitable, they are not good for their development. Even though the babies only spend 2 hours at school, it will improve their ability. Secondly, the babies need to socialize with others. And it will build their self confidence. What’s more, they don’t have friends at home. They are only accompanied by their baby sitter or servant. Thirdly, because they don’t have many friends, their ability to speak is less than the babies who live in a village. If the mothers enroll them to school, they expect their ability to speak will increase. Besides, many schools have bilingual program, the mothers want them to speak English or Mandarin fluently because it’s very important for the future. The mothers are proud of them if the ability of their children is greater than that of the others. It will increase their pride.

Enrolling babies in school is not as easy as we think. When they go to school, they enjoy it. But, the babies often feel bored even though they go to school only two or three times a week. There are many reasons why the babies feel bored. First, perhaps the programs of the school are not interesting. Second, they might fight with their friends, so they feel uncomfortable. And finally, they want their mothers take them to school and be concerned with what they do at school. Usually, grandmothers or grandfathers disagree that the mothers enroll them to school because it’s useless. For grandparents, enrolling the babies earlier won’t increase babies' ability. And enrolling the babies in school will run out the money.

We have to choose a suitable preschool. As we choose a car, we have to choose based on details. We have to look for the information about that school such as what programs that they have, and the experience of the teachers. It’s better if the school is close to our house so the babies won’t be exhausted. Then, we should try a class to find out whether this school is suitable for our baby or not. We have to tell him the fun things that he will do in the class. So, he won’t be surprised about his activity in his school.

How about me? Do I have to enroll my child in school? at First, my parents didn’t support me to enter my son to school. After I explained my reason, they agreed it. But, my father in law didn’t support me because they think it’s not suitable for a 20 month old baby go to school. Even though they forbade me, I didn’t care. Because I am the mother of my son, and I know everything about my son and I know what my son needs, I compete to enroll my son to school. My neighbour said it would be useless to enter him to school because he would be bored. Yes, I know about it. But I am going to study in July, and it takes a lot of time. I won’t be able to teach my son as much as I teach him right now. And I want my son to be smarter than his parents. How about my husband? Well, he agreed with my decision to enroll our son to school. But, he asked me to enroll him in religious school, because a foundation in religion is very important to our son and it will influence his mental development. Even though most religious schools don’t have bilingual program, my husband doesn’t mind. We can teach him English by our selves or when my son enrolls a kindergarten. My enrolling purpose is to increase his self esteem. My son looks introverted and he has low self confidence. Besides, I want to increase his ability to talk because he doesn’t have many friends at home.

WEANING OR NURSING?

I am nursing my 20 month-old and just found out there was a fetus in my womb.. my friend said it's dangerous to breastfeed while pregnant, not only for the fetus but also dangerous for my son.. it makes me confused.. one night, i was trying to wean my son when my mom was at home.. he went to bed with his grandma all night.. mom said he didn't drink anything.. when he was with my mom, i felt lonely.. i woke up many times and tought of him.. in the morning, after having breakfast, my son remembered breastfeeding.. he asked me to breastfeed him, and when i looked at his face.. oh my God.. what did i have to do? finally, i nursed him.. my effort to wean him was failed!
then, my mom went to Jakarta.. and i've not tried to wean him anymore..
When i surf internet, it is told It used to be felt that breastfeeding while pregnant can steal important nutrients from the fetus and can increase the risk of miscarriage. Now we know that this is not true. Many research studies have demonstrated no nutritional risk to the fetus, and no increased risk of miscarriage. Some experts encourage pregnant moms to continue to breastfeed as long as they want to.
There is, however, one situation where breastfeeding during pregnancy is NOT considered safe. For moms who have a history of miscarriages or preterm labor (labor beginning before 37 weeks gestation) with previous pregnancies, breastfeeding may increase the risk of these events occurring again. Why? Because breastfeeding releases a hormone into mom's bloodstream that can cause the uterus to contract. If a mom's uterus is especially sensitive to this hormone (i.e., if a mom has had preterm labor or miscarriages before) then breastfeeding MAY trigger the uterus to contract. However, most women's uteruses are NOT sensitive to this breastfeeding hormone. It is therefore safe to breastfeed during pregnancy. Alhamdulillah, I don't have miscarriage history..
some said, baby will be weaned by himself when the pregnancy goes 4-5 months.. because it produces colostrum for the new baby so the taste will be different as usual..
and now.. i am still confused.. must i continue breastfeeding or weaning him?

WHY I HATE CIPROFLOXACIN

Ciprofloxacin? Oh No..! Don't talk about this antibiotic anymore! Why do I hate it so? Well, I had a bad experience. It happened in February, 2006. When I got mumps, I took an analgesic. But it didn't work. It was worse. I couldn't eat and I was very sick. Then, I went to an internist. Afterwards, he gave me ciprofloxacin and an analgesic. He knew that mumps is due to virus. It was self limited. And the treatment of mumps was not ciprofloxacin. But, he was afraid of lymphadenitis, the differential diagnosis of mumps. It was OK, I thought. I believed in him, besides I couldn't stand the suffering. After that, I finished all ciprofloxacin as he recommended.
Two weeks later, my husband suspected that I was pregnant, whereas in fact I didn't feel it. Yes, he said. Because I urinated many times but my period was not late. He asked me to use pregnancy pack test to find out whether I was pregnant or not. And the result was...
When I saw it at the first time, I thought there was one strip, it meant that It was negative. Then, I gave it to him, and i teased him, " Hey, the result is positive!" Whereas I was sure It was negative. After that, he looked at the pregnant pack test and he said, " Yes, you're right. You're pregnant!" I was surprised. I thought It was negative. I looked at the pregnant pack test again. He was right, I thought. I was pregnant.
Actually, I wanted to have more children before I went to school in July, 2006. But, because I had just gotten over from mumps, I was afraid of my fetus. As you know, ciprofloxacin is one of the drugs which is harmful to the fetus.
Two days later, I went to my gynecologist. After he checked me up, I told him that I had had mumps two weeks ago and I took Ciprofloxacin and analgesic. He was surprised," Uh, Why did you take Ciprofloxacin? Do you know It is harmful and teratogenic. Analgesic is less harmful than Ciprofloxacin. The treatment of mumps is not antibiotic. If you get mumps and you only take Panadol, you'll be fine!" Even though I explained why the internist gave me the antibiotic, he didn't agree with him. Oh my God, I was afraid something happened to my fetus. I said, " It's all up to you, Doc..." I couldn't say anything. I got headache. "Because there is no treatment for this, I'll give you only vitamins", He said.
While my husband was driving home, I was upset and quiet. He said, "That's fine. You should pray and ask God to have a healthy child. All happening in this world depends on God." According to Qur'an, Surah An Nahl (16), verse 40, "For to anything which We have willed, We but say the word "Be", and it is." Besides, If I got stressed, the fetus would be stressed too. And, that would not be good. I tried to relax. I searched some websites that talked about taking ciprofloxacin while pregnant.
According to Center For Drug Evaluation and Research, "while there are no controlled studies of ciprofloxacin use in pregnant women to show safety, an expert review of published data on experiences with ciprofloxacin use during pregnancy by TERIS - the Teratogen Information System - concluded that therapeutic doses during pregnancy are unlikely to pose a substantial teratogenic risk (quantity and quality of data = fair), but the data are insufficient to state that there is no risk. An observational cohort study looking at human experience with five different antibiotics reported a total of 40 pregnancies with ciprofloxacin. Five of the nine women who received ciprofloxacin during the first trimester experienced normal births with no reported congenital abnormalities. The other four first trimester exposures were an ectopic pregnancy, a spontaneous abortion and two terminations." Oh My God, I had been exposed to ciprofloxacin during the first trimester. I was upset. I hoped I was not four of the nine women which was explained above.
I think God is warning me to pray punctually and more often. I must remember Him anytime and anywhere i am. Please God, give me a healthy and perfect child. Now, My pregnancy is going 14 weeks and I hope everything will be fine.